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Merry Christmas sh#$@er was full!
How the Grinch stole Christmas ~Jim Carey
National Lampoons Christmas Vacation
Do or Do Not, There is no try!!
Christmas vacation and elf
Christmas vacation, no doubt.....
Clark....." Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people and I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, #%ckless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey sh&$ he is! Hallelujah! Holy sh&%! Where's the Tylenol?"
For kids its Elf. Gets me every time.
For wife and I Christmas Vacation. I work in the car biz and there's been a running joke when someone says something either unbelievable or impossible like:
"They're looking at a 30,000 vehicle and are trying to get to 350 a month."""
"You serious Clark?"
For ole dad alone its Bad Santa. Wife don't dig but late at night near the end of the holiday season I slip off to watch the unedited veraion.
Kids, (a) Changing speeds is more important than a curve ball (b) you play defense with your feet & (c) Wayne Hancock is the tits.
I am going to memorize that one day...
My other favorite.
Eddie: "Well, don't go putting none of that stuff on my sled Clark. You know that metal plate in my head?"
Clark: "Ah! How could I forget?"
Eddie: "I had to have it replaced, because everytime Cathrine revved up the microwave, I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about a half-hour or so."
"Townes used to say that there's only two kinds of music: the blues and zippity-doo-dah, and this ain't zippity-doo-dah." -Steve Earle
Scrooged. Hands down.
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